Attention: New Additions to Periodic Table 

WOMANIUM (WO)
Physical properties: Generally soft and round in form. Boils at nothing and may freeze any time. Very bitter if not used well.
Chemical properties: Very active and highly unstable. Possesses strong affinity with gold, silver, platinum, and precious stones. Violent when left alone. Turns slightly green when placed next to a better specimen.
Usage: An extremely good catalyst for dispersion of wealth.
Caution: Highly explosive in inexperienced hands!

MANIUM (XY)
Physical properties: Solid at room temperature but gets bent out of shape easily. Difficult to find a pure sample. Due to rust, aging samples are unable to conduct electricity as easily as young samples.
Chemical properties: Attempts to bond with WO any chance it can get. Also tends to form strong bonds with itself. Becomes explosive when mixed with Childrium for prolonged period of time.
Usage: Possibly good methane source.
Caution: In the absence of WO, this element rapidly decomposes and begins to smell.

ADMINISTRATIUM (A)
Physical properties: The heaviest element known to science was recently discovered by chemists at the NRC Research Centre. The element, tentatively named Administratium, has no protons or electrons and thus has an atomic number of 0. However, it does have 1 neutron, 125 assistant neutrons, 75 vice neutrons and 111 assistant vice neutrons. This gives it an atomic mass of 312. These 312 particles are held together in a nucleus by a force that involves the continuous exchange of meson-like particles called memos. (A competing group in Russia has named these particles morons and claims priority of discovery.)

Chemical properties: Since it has no electrons, Administratium is inert. However, it can be detected chemically as it impedes every reaction it comes in contact with. According to the discoverers, a minute amount of Administratium caused one reaction to take over four days to complete, when it would normally occur in less than one second.

Administratium has a normal half life of approximately three years, at which time it does not actually decay, but instead, undergoes a reorganization in which assistant neutrons, vice neutrons and assistant vice neutrons exchange places. Some studies have shown that the atomic weight actually increases after each reorganization.

Usage: Research at other laboratories indicates that Administratium occurs naturally in the atmosphere. It tends to concentrate at certain points such as government agencies, large corporations, universities and NRC and can usually be found in the newest, best maintained buildings.

Caution: Scientists point out that Administratium is known to be toxic at any level of concentration and can easily destroy any productive reactions where it is allowed to accumulate. Attempts are being made to determine how Administratium can be controlled to prevent irreversible damage, but results to date are not promising.

Source of this page:  http://mooni.fccj.org/~ethall/period/period.htm

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